An open letter to Kasey Kahne
Hey, Kasey, how you doing? Just so's you know, I have you in my Fantasy NASCAR league, along with the Busch brothers and Denny Hamlin. And every week I say to myself: "He can't crash again. He's gotta finish this week."
Do you think you could do that for me? Actually finish a race? I'm now 0-4 in my league. Last week, all I needed you to do was stay in the same zip code as Mark Martin but you managed to lose grip and crash all by yourself. Enough already with the Allstate commercials - try to focus on your driving career.