From the 1976 novelty hit for Larry Groce, "Junk Food Junkie"
At lunch time you can always find meAnd here's the environmentally-friendly Sheryl Crow with her unique idea to save the planet:
At the whole earth vitamin bar.
Just sucking on my plain white yogurt
From my hand grown pottery jar.
And sipping little hand pressed cider
With a carrot stick for dessert.
And wiping my face in a natural way
On the sleeve of my peasant shirt.
Crow (4/19): I also like the idea of not using paper napkins, which happen to be made from virgin wood and represent the height of wastefulness. I have designed a clothing line that has what's called a "dining sleeve." The sleeve is detachable and can be replaced with another "dining sleeve," after usage. The design will offer the "diner" the convenience of wiping his mouth on his sleeve rather than throwing out yet another barely used paper product. I think this idea could also translate quite well to those suffering with an annoying head cold.Hippies smell.
6 comments:
Also from Sheryl's blog:
I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting...we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required... a reality show...of 10 people who are competing for the top spot as the person who lives the "greenest" life... The winner of this challenging, prestigious, contest would receive what??. . . . a recording contract!!!!!
The blog is cowritten with Larry David's wife. Despite Matt Drudge's two-day boner for this, er, story, does the concept "she's kidding" enter your minds at any point?
Or has the brutal experience of living under the tyrannical thumb of Sheryl Crow killed not only our national freedom, but our incredulity?
So she purposely undermined this all-important issue, with the help of the producer of "An Inconvenient Truth" for a laugh?
Was their account of the Karl Rove encounter also an invention? They kinda lost me when they wrote he whipped out a sock full of nickels.
Yeah, I don't buy it.
Even if this terror blog is to be taken at face value, Sheryl Crow would make a laughable villain. And there's every reason to believe that it shouldn't be (3 squares of toilet paper in an emergency? Go green, win studio time?).
In any event, I shall reserve judgement on the geoeconomic impact of Sheryl Crow's blog until I hear what Justin Timberlake or Kid Rock have to say about the ozone layer.
Is the right that hard up for boogeymen? Wow. 2004 must feel like about fifty years ago to you guys.
Hmmm...no retraction or clarification from the Crow camp after two days. Must be a slow-burn gag.
And that's a nice twist: a Lefty makes a complete (unwiped) ass of herself, we laugh about it, and it's all just a big distraction from Iraq. Can we ever laugh again?
If Al Gore with his 20 kilowatt/month home is the new bogeyman, it's because he makes it so darn easy.
Hmmm...no retraction or clarification from the Crow camp after two days. Must be a slow-burn gag.
"Ms. Crow, the committee has before it a printout of the Drudge Report, dated April 22, 2007. Do you deny making the statements attributed to you? And may I remind you, Ms. Crow, you are still under oath!"
Uhhhhhhhh...........Ms. Crow, have you heard of cloth napkins?
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