Whatever pays the bills - Hey, I'm getting caught up on the past week's events and I can't not mention Britney Spears. Know why? Because "Britney Spears" and "Lindsay Lohan" = cheap traffic from errant Google hits. This account from the Superficial is hilarious because it claims that an inconsolable Britney ran off stage after the VMA awards because the camera added ten pounds. Or fifty.

BTW, Britney was recently cleared of dog abuse charges. However, I'm pretty sure her kids are surviving on Pixy Stix and Red Bull.