Obscure Jessica Simpson joke ahead - John Roberts was raised in Buffalo, New York up until the second grade. Buffalo wings are made from chicken, not buffalo! Can we trust John Roberts on the Supreme Court when he grew up in a city that doesn’t interpret recipes in the literal sense? A city that spawned Tim Russert and a football team that lost the Superbowl four years in a row? He must be stopped!

Extra – The ABA gives John Roberts a unanimous “well-qualified” rating. Orin Kerr notes that if the ABA had a sense of humor, it would have rated him “over-qualified.”