P.J. O’Rourke mans the “blazer radio” Wednesday night

From the Weekly Standard: “Putting words in the President’s mouth – Sixteen obvious points that George W. Bush should make during the Wednesday night debate”

(1) My opponent, Massachusetts senator John Kerry--or, as I like to think of him, Teddy Kennedy with a designated driver . . .
(7) You say that we won the war, but we're losing the peace because Iraq is so unstable. When Iraq was stable, it attacked Israel in the 1967 and 1973 wars. It attacked Iran. It attacked Kuwait. It gassed the Kurds. It butchered the Shiites. It fostered terrorism in the Middle East. Who wants a stable Iraq?
(15) Senator Kerry, you say you were in favor of threatening to use force on Saddam Hussein, but that actually using force was wrong. The technical term for this in political science is "bulls---."

The next debate is supposed to focus on domestic issues, so just repeat after me: Ted Kennedy, Ted Kennedy, Ted Kennedy:

Tomorrow the last debate will be held - and the punditry is full of references to Kerry's supposed advantage in this. Don't believe it for a moment - President Bush is going to mop the floor with Kerry's moth-eaten domestic Ted Kennedyism.

I knew you could!