Transcript of John Allen Muhammad’s opening statement

From the WashPost: Muhammad is acting as his own attorney in the sniper trial and gave this bizarre opening statement in his defense. First, he talked at length about catching his daughter with her hand in the cookie jar. Later, he was interrupted by the District Attorney who pointed out that an opening statement usually presents some facts for the defense. Muhammad responded:

Regardless of how loud it may get, regardless of how much emphasis may be put on it, it doesn't change it. It's just a theory. It's an assumption. We're looking for facts. We are looking for evidence, and the evidence will show that I had nothing to do with these crimes, that I had nothing to do with these crimes directly or indirectly, that I know anything about these crimes, that I know any times of these crimes or anything pertaining to these crimes at all.

Bear in mind that Muhammad was captured in his car, which had a snipers nest built into the trunk. With a snipers rifle. That matched the ballistics to all the D.C. area victims. And so on.

John, this ain’t L.A. and you’re not getting the O.J. jury.